I am also testing out a theory I have. When SPAIN played their first game, I decided to wear my Fernando replica the night before and also had the misfortune of not being able to watch the game live. We all know how that game turned out. For their second game, I decided to not wear my replica and had a chance to watch the game live at work. And they won. I’m hoping that by watching the game live today and by not wearing my Fernando Jersey yesterday, they will be able to accomplish the same result. Call me superstitious or crazy, I really don’t care. I’m doing all I can to help my team.
With that final note, here is my retro-active diary from today’s SPAIN vs. Chile. As before, I guarantee there will be swearing.
Starting line-ups:
Chile: don’t know, don’t care
Spain: Casillas, Ramos, Pique, Puyol, Capdevila, Busquets(ugh), Alonso, Iniesta, Xavi(Chameleon Eyes), Villa, Torres(will further be referred to as “Fernando”)
Seems like Del Bosque is going with a more direct attacking strategy now that he has Iniesta back in the lineup. Certainly better than the down-the-wing attacking that the tried on Monday against Honduras. Also, when he is going to give Fábregas some love?
-5:00: National anthems…Chile’s sucks (of course). SPAIN’s is awesome. And Fernando looks wicked hot. Thank you on field cameraman who is doing pans of the team. What does it take to be one of those kids that get to walk out with the team?
-1:00: Del Bosque kind of looks like Inspector Clouseau. Just saying
0:00: And it’s on. SPAIN wearing their dark blue uniforms? Chile is in red. This is going to be confusing.
1:06: Fernando’s first touches. Tries to pass through a defender. Silly boy.
2:09: Pique stops some Chile attacking momentum.
2:19: Chile gets a pass behind the defense, but Casillas is there to clean up. Oof
4:05: A long ball by Capdevila that Fernando runs on to but the defender deflects it for a corner. Fernando has got to win those.
5:01: Chameleon Eyes on the free kick and 18 seconds later draws another foul. He definitely needs to play will if SPAIN has a chance.
7:28: Fernando with another bad touch. You better correct yourself before you wreck yourself.
9:00: Chilean free kick from some distance. Could be trouble, but the defense gets it. Followed by an uninspired run by Fernando.
9:42: another chance for Chile. Unacceptable. Thank God the attacker couldn’t keep his composure.
11:01: some of these Spanish passes are not connecting properly. Got to get their sh*t together.
14:52: Yellow card to some Chilean. SPAIN needs to take this free kick and start completing some passes. Chile is attacking hard, almost putting SPAIN off kilter.
17:22: I’m starting to get angry by the way SPAIN is playing. I know they can play better, and hopefully they will…like now!
18:56: Yellow card by another Chilean for donkey kicking Fernando as he is trying to pick up the ball. What a douche.
20:31: Another yellow for Chile. Now we see what strategy they’re going with. Keep it a tie and just foul on every Spanish player.
22:38: Stop giving up free kicks there! Honestly. My anxiety level is unusually high
23:50: ON
MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD!!!! Villa scores on an empty goal while the Chilean goalkeeper is out getting the ball from Fernando. Holy Shit!!!!! Can’t breathe!!! Villa is the f*cking man!!!! 1-0 SPAIN25:30: Okay…I’m doing okay now. SPAIN just has to keep it together now. Well done Fernando for getting the goalkeeper out there. Now let’s get another one!
26:20: A Chilean asshole who already has a yellow just tactically fouls Iniesta. Lay off, buddy!
27:45: And Villa just sends the free kick all the way to Johannesburg. How about you stop taking those, yeah?
31:03: Gah…Puyol what are you doing?!?! Stop dicking around and get the ball out.
32:25: A couple of inspired passes by Iniesta and Villa only to be f*cked up by Fernando. Fernando…I love you as much as a young lady can love her favorite footballer, but you are sucking my dear. We might have to sub you for Fábregas. At least his touch should be better.
33:50: Chile gets down on the attack and thankfully Pique gets there in time to deflect it to the side netting. Might have just crapped my pants a little.
35:22: Hello, that guy just totally steamrolled Fernando! Where’s the penalty, ref? He clearly wasn’t going for the ball. Bullsh*t. That could have been Fernando’s
36:18: F*CK YEAH!!!!!! Some great passing between Iniesta, Fernando and Villa pases back to Iniesta for another goal. Ini-f*cking-esta!!!!!! WHAT UP HATERS!!! And a Ch
ilean gets a second yellow for tackling poor Fernando. Eff you Chile! How about them apples? 2-0 SPAIN 38:18: Yeah, the foul on Fernando looks fairly soft, but when you have been playing that fast and loose with the fouling, it was only a matter of time before you got your second yellow. Have fun NOT playing in the Round of 16, you fool.
40:50: Chile on a tasty run down the side. Let’s not get lackadaisical now that we have a two-goal lead. Momentum stopped by Ramos.
42:58: Chile getting back to stupid fouls. More, more, MORE!!!!
44:29: Haven’t said this in a while, and normally I do whenever I watch Iniesta play: He looks like my old English professor, Dr. Appleby. There, I have it out of the way.
45+: Two minutes of stoppage. Let’s slow this down and knock out some good passes.
45+: Chile fouls Alonso…and he’s still down. Bring in Fábregas!!! Alonso hasn’t done sh*t this game.
Halftime: I’m definitely starting to breathe easier now after those two goals, but SPAIN still needs to step it up. This is FAR from their best soccer, and I’m sure Del Bosque will have some (not so pleasant) words with the team at half.
Also, while Fernando has had a hand in both of the goals, he needs to get his head out of his ass. His touches are awful and he needs more hustle on some of his runs. There are moments were he does seem to find some burst of speed. Still, the second half needs to be better all around.
At halftime, Switzerland and Honduras are tied. C’mon Honduras…teach those Swiss bastards about what happens when you mess with España!
Chile will most likely come out attacking hard. They will want to score a goal because if Switzerland manages to get one against Honduras, it will be “so long” for the Chileans. At least it would save them from having to play Brazil.
46:00: Second half under way. Let’s demolish these Chilean sea asses! (that was supposed to be like Chilean sea bass…duh)
46:48: What the f*ck? Chile scores? Defenders didn’t close in on him on time and the shot deflected off Pique. F*ck…Now I’m back to worrying again. Let’s get another goal to ease my worrying. 2-
1 SPAIN 49:05: Certainly will be a wake up call for Spain
51:58: Hand to Puyol’s face. I know he’s not that attractive, but that is still a little rude.
53:57: Finally!!! Fábregas coming on for Fernando. As much as I love you Fernando, this is for the best. Let’s go Cesc!
55:05: Fábregas already with a superb touch. Where have you been this whole game?
57:25: David Villa…stop passing the ball. You are there to score goals, not pretend to be Xavi. C’mon!
59:59: Fábregas with a good chip to Villa but he can’t find the proper footing. He’s already shaping up as a wise substitution
62:08: Good ball by Chameleon eyes to Villa who falls is taken down but no call. Balls.
67:35: Villa sprints with the ball about 60 yards and wins a corner for SPAIN. Let’s do something with this.
68:08: Okay, I guess we’re not.
68:56: Chilean coach having a moment of silence…for himself.
71:39: A J. Martinez is about to come in for SPAIN. Who the hell is J. Martinez?
72:51: J Martinez comes in for Alonso. About time, though I’m a little worried that I have never heard of J. Martinez.
75:36: Iniesta just pulled a David Villa and launched that shot into the stands. Ugh
77:08: When was the last time the ref called a foul on either team. Seems like a while. Oh wait, there’s one…on SPAIN. Bah
79:05: Yeah Chilean…you were offside. Get over it.
80:00: Ten minutes left and I really have to pee. Must. Hold. It.
82:42: SPAIN has only had 56% possession of the ball. When was the last time SPAIN had less than 60% of possession? Not in the time I have been watching them.
85:10: Can’t hold it any longer. Gotta pee. BRB.
86:13: And I’m back…feeling a lot better. And Spanish and Chilean fans are starting to fight each other in the stands. The Chilean is dressed like a cowboy. This is too much.
88:01: SPAIN just kind of passing the ball around and Chile is letting them. Both teams are happy with the result and are going to let the game play out since both teams are advancing.
89:03: Cross by Ramos to the middle and Fábregas swings and misses. Oof.
89:44: Substitute David Silva has waited over 3 minutes to come on, but the ball hasn’t gone out of play. Bahahahaha
90+: 2 minutes of stoppage. Just 120 more seconds to redemption. C’mon SPAIN!!!
90+: David Silva is still waiting…and the game is over!!! SPAIN wins 2-1 to win Group H!!!
Wohoo…after days of anxiety, I can finally breathe a little easier. Spain manages to win Group H after losing their first game. They still have yet to play their finest game, and they need to step it up if they hope to have a chance against Portugal. Still…beautiful goals by Villa and Iniesta is enough to propel my Roja into the knockout stage.
And congrats to Chile for overcoming their devastating earthquake to make it to the next round of the World Cup for the first time in God knows when. Unfortunately, they will have to play Brazil, so it looks like their World Cup glory will be coming to a swift end.
It also looks as if my theory works. That means no Fernando shirt on Monday and I get to watch the game live in the comfort of my own home on Tuesday. Until next time…
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