Confession: I HATE the Lakers!

This may come off as some sort of blasphemy since I live in the greater LA area, but, for real though, I absolutely detest the Lakers. Don't like the players (especially Kobe), don't like the coach, don't like how people go ape sh*t over them...and especially don't like the stupid little Laker car flags that people have. I mean, a bumper sticker I can understand...but a little flag that you attached to your car window. Can you please get over yourselves for a minute???

I don't think that this hatred really started to percolate until after I started my internship at KCAL Sports, which is the main carrier for Laker games. Before working there, I just had a healthy dislike of the team...mainly because they won all the time and I'm used to teams that genuinely gawd-awful or find a way to disappoint their fans. But after working at KCAL, my dislike started to grow into disgust, which has finally matured into a heaping dose of hostility. I don't know why, but every time I am at KCAL, there is always a Laker game on (except for yesterday, thank God!) and every time I have to sit and hear all the people get riled up over the game. They're always yelling about cussing about how the refs never give fair calls to the Lakers (I mean, get over it) and then start jumping up and down every time Kobe makes a lay-up. All their noise is making my ears bleed and all I want to do is scream, "IT'S JUST BASKETBALL PEOPLE!!!" Also, last time I checked, Kobe Bryant wasn't God...in fact I'm pretty certain that he's a rapist from a few years back. And what's with Phil Jackson. No one is THAT calm!

Stop smiling, you a-hole!

Now, you may be wondering why I continue to work at KCAL during the summer if I hate the Lakers so much. Well...two reasons. First, their season will be done by the middle of June at the latest. Maybe earlier if the Suns can get their ish together. But the second reason, and by far the most important, is that it is so fun to watch my coworkers cower in a state of depression every time the Lakers lose. Now, I know that it is mean to take pleasure in other people's misery, but it is just so funny to see Laker fans get all miserable. For example, I happened to work the day that the Lakers got their asses handed to them by the Oklahoma City Thunder (RIP Sonics). I swear, I thought that a few of the producers and some of the interns were going to climb to the roof and jump off. It was as if the Pope (or maybe Kobe) had died. Meanwhile, I was over at my station, laughing my butt off. Of course, the Lakers haven't lost a game since then, so look who's laughing now. And the worst part is that they are probably going to repeat as NBA "World" Champions (last time checked, the NBA only consisted of teams from America...and Canada, I guess) since I don't see how the Suns or either the Celtics or Magic can beat them in a seven game series. Balls...but maybe I'll get a chance to go to the victory parade, which might be exciting since I know I might never experience one of those in Seattle.

One last thing...Pau Gasol is ugly. There, I'm done.